Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
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