did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Randomize
