5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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