We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
