How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
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