i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
