i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
