Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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