Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
