Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
