Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Randomize
