She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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