I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
