all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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