i just had sex bonerless
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
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