Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
