Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
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