In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
