i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
We have so much sex to catch up on
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Randomize
