bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
