Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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