At least make sure they are 18
Why
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Randomize
