I hope mine doesn't look like that
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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