in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
