u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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