problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
