This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Life is so much better after having sex.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
