This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Randomize
