I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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