have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize