That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
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