I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
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