it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Randomize
