News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I have already put on my inside pants.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Randomize
