I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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