Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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