And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
