BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize