there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
do herpes really smell.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
