i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
