I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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