everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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