does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
