I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
