i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
