My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
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