Just mADE A PArabola og urine
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
