It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
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