One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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