You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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