Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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