I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
