I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
